“Swing your partner round and round…and turn your corner upside down…Circle right and you get straight…And we’ll all go east on a westbound freight…Chew your tobacco and rub your snuff…And meet your honey and strut your stuff…Right foot up and left foot down...And make that big foot jar the ground…Smash Hamas as you pass to the right…Drive Hezbollah into the ground with all your might.”

It could have been Uncle Jed and Jethro and Ellie Mae do-se-doing in the Clampett vestibule with Lester Flatt on the guitar and Earl Scruggs on the banjo. It could have been but it wasn’t. And it wasn’t Adolph Hitler dancing a jig in front of the railroad carriage at Compiegne or George Armstrong Custer whirling Phil Sheridan round and round in the clover fields after the Battle of Cedar Creek. No, it was those dizzy campus cutups, the College Republicans at San Francisco State University (SFSU) doing their thing. Poor kids had never heard of Timothy Leary. Tuning in, turning on, dropping out didn’t mean a thing to them. To an unwary college student education can be a Black Hole in space; first it’s Michael Moore and then Noam Chomsky and Moveon.org. But College Republicans are made of sterner stuff than the average college student. They have fewer stars in their eyes and demand an active life.

The sons and daughters of Old Abe and Ronnie Reagan held an anti-terrorism rally last October 17 at San Francisco State University complete with Hamas and Hezbollah flags that turned into a kind of square dance. As everyone knows College Republicans tend to be impecunious when it comes to spending money. So instead of purchasing the flags they used the latest technology to transfer Hamas and Hezbollah banners to butcher paper—saved enough money to purchase a gallon of marble fudge for their next ice cream social. Sure. They didn’t burn the flags—it would have been over in seconds. They had a better idea. They spread the flags on the ground and held a hoedown—as brief as it was. Butcher paper is on the flimsy side compared to burlap. It doesn’t hold up well when assaulted by normal College Republican footwear—said to be hobnailed boots and spiked heels.

It was a dastardly act! It must have been the “ And make that big foot jar the ground” that did it. Everyone at San Francisco State was outraged—the Muslim Students Association, the university Office of Student Programs and Leadership Development, university President Robert A. Corrigan; all the campus subgroups, the Free Jose Padilla Now Committee, the Gerald Nadler Optimist Club, the Sons and Daughters of Leon Czolgosz, the Faculty Lounge Lizards for Fidel, Islamic Jihad for Peace and CAIR and MPAC. A complaint was filed against the College Republicans for ‘attempts to incite violence and create a hostile environment’ and ‘actions of incivility.’ Violence? Hostility? Incivility? Never wear a George W. Bush T-shirt to an anti-terror rally. University spokeswoman Ellen Griffin told the San Francisco Chronicle, “I don’t believe the complaint is about desecration of the flag. I believe that the complaint is the desecration of Allah.” (Whoa! Desecration of Allah! Wha-cha talking about, Willis?) Ms. Griffin was serious. Multiculturalism has driven the last vestige of common sense from the heads of college administrators all across America. And don’t mention of freedom of speech and freedom of expression. That’s why Uncle Jed pulled Jethro out of Berkeley.

But back to the flags: Those squiggly little lines at the top of the Hezbollah banner—the ones that look like worms—are not worms! They are words—words taken from Qur’an 5:56. They say: Then surely the party of Allah are they that shall be triumphant. Upon closer examination, the logo itself is made up of words—it says Party of God. The arm brandishing the Kalashnikov is the first letter of Allah. So much for the religion of peace and toleration! But that’s not all. The worms at the bottom, beneath the logo, say, “The Islamic Resistance in Lebanon.” Does George W. Bush know this? Does Condi Rice know this? Not so as one would notice—Muslims with ties to terrorism have been in and out of the White House on a regular basis for some time. Try Abdulraham Alamoudi and Muzammil Saddiqui.

The wheels of injustice grind slowly on Campus America and it wasn’t until March 9, 2007, that San Francisco State University brought the College Republicans before a hearing on charges of desecrating the name of Allah. The University has ten days to decide whether or not to punish the students. The Foundation for Individual Rights in Education (FIRE) is defending the students. They sent a letter to President Corrigan: “No American public institution can lawfully prosecute students for engaging in political protest or for desecrating religious symbols.” ‘Incitement’ and ‘creating a hostile environment’ are legal terms not applicable to stepping on flags. (You tell ‘em, Willis!) Unless the University has a plaster cast of Joe College’s size 12s lifted from the remains of a Hezbollah flag made out of butcher paper they couldn’t get a conviction in any recognized court this side of Sharia Law. Did Ms. Griffin tell Inspector Clouseau to stow the remains of the flag in the evidence locker at the Mujahideen Center? If not, they don’t have a case. It’s amazing how little the modern university knows about law and students’ rights. Nonetheless, Ms Griffin told the San Francisco Chronicle that the University “stands behind the process.” The question is how far behind.

Muslim and Palestinians students routinely burn American and Israeli flags on college campuses from Aquadunk to Zitsburgen and few, if any college administrators complain. It’s a First Amendment right, they say—Can’t do anything about it—free matches and kerosene are available at the bin Laden Center. Some universities have taken steps to ban the display of American flags on their campuses—Marquette, Lehigh, Central Michigan; Arizona State—not because they find the torching of Old Glory distasteful but because they consider the American flag to be an offensive symbol. If San Francisco State University wants to avoid further flag stomping incidents they could ban the on-campus display of Hamas and Hezbollah flags and the College Republicans could be forced to attend multicultural seminars where they would learn to respect Hamas and Hezbollsh and hate George W. Bush.

Some time ago, during one of the Congressional flag-burning debates, Rep. Gary Ackerman (D-NY), defended the First Amendment. This is an extrapolation of what he said with some of the words changed to fit the circumstances at SFSU. “If College Republicans step on a flag, Islam is not threatened. If College Republicans step on a flag, the Sharia is not under siege. If College Republicans step on a flag, freedom is not at risk and Osama bin Laden is not threatened. My colleagues, we are offended and to change our Constitution because someone offended us is in itself unconscionable.” These are impressive words but there are those who would change the US Constitution to exempt Islam from full participation in democracy. The trials and tribulations of freedom are not for them and neither are the joys and wonders of everyday life. It’s time for Ackerman—and John Conyers and Keith Ellison—to show what they are really made of and defend the College Republicans instead of aiding those who would destroy America.

Addendum: From the Secret History of America Files: One night last October when Flatt and Scruggs were visiting the Clampetts, Jethro was late for the hoedown. When he finally showed up, Uncle Jed looked him up and down. “Doggies, Jethro,” he said. “Where have you been? And what’s all that butcher paper stuck to your shoes?”

It’s not Bonaparte’s retreat; it’s not Cornpone’s disaster. It’s a phased redeployment; it’s a staged withdrawal; it’s a strategic retrograde. It’s keeping faith with the voters; it’s the Dunkirk option; it’s a change of course. We’re merely advancing in another direction, they say—a direction the Bush administration doesn’t like.

“Congress has an obligation to do something,” says US Representative Nancy Boyda ((D-KS). “Our bill calls for the redeployment of U.S. troops out of Iraq so that we can focus more fully on the real war on terror, which is in Afghanistan,” says House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-CA). “The troops should not be policing a civil war,” says Senator Harry Reid (D-NV). “I look forward to even stronger steps,” says Senator Russell Feingold (D-WI). “This administration is frankly unable to run a two-car parade,” says Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton (D-NY).

See? Isn’t it obvious? The Democrats are not retreating; they are not turning tail; they are not showing the white feather; they are not cutting and running. They are brave warriors—men and women—and smart too. They have heard of Fabius and Hannibal and Sun Tzu’s Art of War. Most of them haven’t seen the elephant but neither has George W. Bush—or Dick Cheney, for that matter. They remember Vietnam. They know a quagmire when they see one. Some of them remember the Korean War and what happened at the Chosen Reservoir. They remember Opie Smith. Some of them may actually think they are reincarnations of Opie Smith. For Boyda, Pelosi, Reid, Feingold, Clinton et al, in their own pathetic way, are attempting to do what Opie did in Korea—retreat in another direction.

And who was Opie Smith? Opie was Oliver P. Smith. He commanded the 1^st Marine Division in 1950. Opie and his 30,000 Gyrenes were surrounded by 70,000 Chinese Communist ‘volunteers’ at the Chosen Reservoir in the bitter winter of ‘50-51 with temperatures hovering at twenty below zero. Out of everything but guts, O.P. struck out for Hungnam, taking his dead and wounded with him in one of the epic retrograde marches in the history of warfare. When someone suggested he was retreating, O.P. said, “Retreat, Hell! We’re just advancing in another direction!”

Is that the Democratic plan? It seems to be what they are saying—isn’t it?

The quagmire is up to the knees. Abe Lincoln would have said the bottom was out of the tub. Lincoln was a Republican and he had a Congress full of Copperheads—Democrats—who’s hearts weren’t in the war, sort of like Pelosi and Feingold and Reid. Pull out of Georgia, pull out of Mississippi said the Copperheads—negotiate, negotiate, then Nathan Bedford Forrest and John Hunt Morgan will stop terrorizing us. Did they mean al-Qaeda and Islamic Jihad? If Lincoln hadn’t invaded the South there would be no Civil War and we would be at peace, they said. Was Lincoln fighting the war to free the slaves or for cotton to feed New England textile mills? Is Bush fighting to free the slaves or is it for oil? Michael Moore says it is for oil. Who is Teddy Kennedy going to believe?

And so it came to pass and the Democrats won the Presidency in 2008 and lo and behold, before the next midterm election, Nancy Pelosi said, “Our bill calls for the redeployment of U.S. troops out of Afghanistan so that we can focus more fully on the real war on terror, which is in the Gaza Strip and Israel.” “The troops should not be policing a civil war,” agreed Harry Reid, for, indeed, Afghanistan had become Iraq II, a civil war. It was time for another phased redeployment, another staged withdrawal, another strategic retrograde. Well, that made sense. What worked in Iraq should work in Afghanistan. Besides—it was what the voters wanted. The withdrawal went off without a hitch and there was peace in our time. But things weren’t going that well in the Gaza Strip and Israel. There were car bombs and suicide attacks.

And there were more elections and Nancy Pelosi said, “Our bill calls for the redeployment of U.S. troops out of the Middle East so that we can focus more fully on the real war on terror, which is along the Mexican border.“ It wasn’t easy. “I look forward to even stronger steps than in Afghanistan,” enthused Russ Feingold. Jimmy Carter was called out of retirement. He was the only Democrat who understood the Roadmap to Peace in the Middle East and after meeting with the Muslim Students Association and the Palestine Solidarity Movement in Plains, Georgia, Jimmy announced a plan that would end apartheid for all time. America would divest from Israel and if that didn’t work an embargo would be declared. It was tough love but something had to be done to bring the Zionists to their knees, ah, to the bargaining table. “We can’t stay in Israel forever,” warned Harry Reid. He was right. Once began, retrograde movements are difficult to stop. Iraq, Afghanistan, Israel—John F. Kennedy’s domino theory. America needed George S. Patton and Teddy Roosevelt—they had George Soros and Teddy Kennedy.

One election followed another and Uncle Sam withdrew to Festung America. There would be no fighting on the beaches, no fighting in the fields, no fighting anywhere—not in El Paso or in the streets in front of the Grand Saudi Mosque in Boston. Yet the border seethed. New Mexico became a province of Old Mexico. The Minute Men and the Navajo Nation became allies. Everyone despaired. There was one last election and then Madame President Nancy Pelosi addressed the nation. “Our bill,” she said, “calls for the redeployment of U.S. troops from the Mexican border so that we can focus on the real war on terror, which is in Dearborn, Michigan.” She paused; then continued, “I have no purpose, directly or indirectly, to interfere with the institution of slavery in the States where it exists. I believe I have no lawful right to do so, and I have no inclination to do so. Therefore I am removing our troops from the banks of the Rio Grande and assigning them to the Alamo.” There would be no Fort Sumter.

A hush fell over Congress assembled. Even Robert Byrd was at a loss for words. Keith Ellison snickered. At last, Virgil Goode (R-VA) spoke up. “But you can’t do that, Madame President,” he said. “The United Nations gave the Alamo to Mexico in the settlement of 2020.”

President Pelosi smiled. “ Our relations with Mexico are exceedingly good,” she said as if talking to a child. “I am sure President Villa will give us a few acres—enough for the Jane Fonda Brigade to hang their washing.”

The Democratic Party has not supported the war in Iraq and will not support a war in Afghanistan. An American withdrawal will lead to a disaster. Al-Qaeda will not disband and go home. They will move lock, stock and RPGs to Afghanistan, ally themselves with radical Islamists and warlords, and the real war for Afghanistan will commence. Sooner or later the Democrats will insist on pulling out. They are not in this war for the long haul and never have been. Indeed, support for Israel, America’s only ally in the Middle East, has been eroding rapidly in the Democratic Party and Pelosi and her pals could easily stab the Israelis in the back while withdrawing to Festung America just as another generation of Democrats deserted the South Vietnamese in the 1970s. The terrorists have taken the measure of the Democratic Party and know in which direction they are advancing—Iraq today, the Mexican border tomorrow.

e

It’s graduation time at the Mad-Rats-Asses Schools, Class of 2007! (Special Sneak Preview!)

Well, it’s getting close to that time of year again—graduation day. Potsy and Ralph Malph are still seniors; the Fonz has replaced Evel Knievel, and Richie Cunningham hasn’t got a hair on his head. Opie is now Sheriff of Mayberry: Alfalfa retired five years ago—made a fortune in the agro-business once he discovered wheat was more profitable than animal fodder. Things have changed since Opie was in school. Remember when the dog ate Junior’s homework? That one doesn’t work anymore. Junior uses a computer now and dogs don’t eat computers—not even when smeared with Kibbles and Bits. It’s been tried. But computers crash and get run over by SUVs. Some schools don’t bother with homework—it’s too stressful and it’s bad for Junior’s self esteem, especially if he gets a failing grade. Oh, the ignominy—he could come back to school in a trench coat! And there are plenty of distractions—time off for good behavior. Kids are let out of school to attend gay pride parades and anti-war rallies. Tag is forbidden on some playgrounds—too much unseemly touching. Anyway, it’s a game for sexist chauvinist pigs. Bart Simpson has replaced Socrates as the moral philosopher in some 5^th grade classes. More teachers are sent to the principal’s office for failure to control their raging hormones than kids with names like Stud and Buck and Hot Sue. But not everything has changed. The Mad-Rats-Asses schools continue to turn out bumper crops of suicide bombers. The overhead is low—suicide belts are cheaper than shoulder pads, practice doesn’t take anywhere near as long and the prospective ‘athlete’ has to play only one game. What drives the kids in these Mad-Rats-Asses schools to excel? It’s an interesting question.

Maxflack was determined to find out. Disguised as a Mad Mullah, he interviewed several recent graduates to get an insight into their hopes and aspirations. Get-well cards can be sent to www.maxflackreport.com

(The following comments were unrehearsed and were not edited for clarity).

Ibrahim (eight-years old): “I am learning what an infidel is. They are the same as dhimmis. They are apes and pigs—but you wouldn’t know that to look at them. They use a lot of Maybelline and go to barbershops. They are very good at disguising themselves. My brother says most of the infidels live in America and the dhimmis live in Europe. Infidels are tougher than dhimmis. I am also learning how to rock back and forth on my prayer rug. It’s a lot of fun. Some times I forget my lines. When I get to Paradise I want to be a synchronized prayer rug dancer for Allah, PBUH. That would make my mother proud…my father too. But first I must kill a few dhimmis—or better yet, some infidels. I wish there weren’t so many of them. I keep forgetting their names. The only one I can remember is George W. Bush. He is a cowboy and he wears a ten-gallon hat. The Imam says George W. Bush doesn’t know his Axis from his differential. The Imam is a very smart man. Allah has blessed him. He has three turbans and Ibrahim Hooper’s private telephone number. When I grow up, I want to own three turbans. But why should I have to wait till I grow up? I could be dead before then—how many times can I blow myself up in a crowded pizza parlor without getting hurt? Three or four times…tops! Maybe my parents could buy me a turban before I finish demolition class. My sister has already written a poem glorifying my demise…What’s a demise? I don’t know what I will do with 72 virgins—I’m only eight-years old, and I’ve never seen MTV. Do you think Ibrahim Hooper could get me a Britney Spears video?”

Mohammed (nine-years old): “Before I enrolled in the Daisy Cutter Mad-Rats-Asses School, I didn’t know anything about infidels. Now, thanks to Allah, PBUH, I have learned to hate them…Some times I sway back and forth on my prayer rug so hard, I get dizzy and fall off. Don’t you just hate that? My uncle said I should put Velcro on my knees. Doesn’t that hurt? Where can I get some Velcro? I asked my Hamas instructor. He said I should go to a Jew—they sell things cheaper than anybody else so they can cheat them later on. That’s why he buys everything he can from the Jews. But that doesn’t make sense. Why would a Jew do you a favor? We never do any for them…When I grow up I want to be like Osama bin Laden. Once upon a time—when I was real little—I wanted to be like Rudolph Valentino. My grandmother said she had a crush on him when she was young. Then one day, cousin Habib saw Valentino’s picture on grandma’s dresser. She still has a crush on Valentino. Oh-oh! I wasn’t supposed to say that! Grandma got stoned last year for watching a Valentino video. She still walks with a limp. They will never catch me watching a Valentino video! I watch the Three Infidel Stooges—Larry, Moe, and Ariel. They make me laugh so hard I fall off my prayer rug. Don’t you just hate that?”

Abdul (ten-years old): “I have been attending advanced classes at the Islamic Jihad Mad-Rats-Asses School. We have been reading The Protocols of the Elders of Zion. It’s my favorite book next to Mein Kampf… Have you ever met Adolph Hitler? What’s a Fuhrerbunker? Why did Roosevelt and Churchill torture him? Did you ever belong to the Ku Klux Klan? Why do they wear white sheets? Don’t they get dirty? If I was an American, I would join the Klan, wear white sheets and burn crosses. Could you get me David Duke’s autograph? How far is it from Washington, DC, to Britney Spears’ house? Could I use the Underground Railroad? Am I asking too many questions? Oh…Next week we are going to learn how to set timers and fuses. It is very important that we learn how to do this correctly. It would be terribly embarrassing for my family if I should blow myself up accidentally. There would be no pension and no 72 virgins. I would have to make do with leftovers. I don’t want to let my family down. That’s why I go to night school three times a week—that and because I accidentally set fire to my prayer rug. You would think they would be fireproof…I hope they will send me to Camp David because that’s where Dhimmi Carter fooled Sadat. I don’t have any idea of where it is. If it’s not in Texas, I’ll try Disney World. Do you know Opie Taylor?

Habib (eleven-years old): “When I finish my Mad-Rats-Asses education I want to learn how to fly a plane. I want to be like Mohammed Atta. I also want to learn how to skydive and how to pack a parachute. Not that I am afraid of dying for Allah, PBUH, it’s just that I’d like to know more about those 72 virgins, and whether or not I’d be able to handle that many. I have a girlfriend. Her name is Fatima. I am told she is a virgin. That’s good. But she is driving me crazy! If I can’t control her, and she is only one, how am I going to control 72? That’s an astronomical number…more than a dozen…maybe two-dozen! And if I’m a virgin and all the girls are virgins, how are we going to know what to do? It’s scary! So before I go crashing a plane into a building, I’d like to know if I might change my mind at the last minute. Does that make me a bad Muslim? If anybody suspected me of heresy, I’d be thrown out of school. Then where would I go? They’re not teaching me any useful skills. I could clean stables, but a real good job, like slicing potatoes at a McDonalds would be far beyond my schooling. It’s scary!”

Fatima (nine-years old): “The infidels would dress me up in short skirts and make me play with Barbie dolls. They would cart me off to Disneyland and make me go on silly rides; they would make me dance with Potsy and Ralph Malph; they would make he eat greasy hamburgers so I would be unclean and couldn’t get into heaven. They would make me play silly sports and paint my face with rouge and lipstick till I looked like Irma La Duce. I’d have to talk on the phone for hours and hours, listen to Hip Hop and show my navel at the beach. What kind of life would that be for a child? That’s why I’m glad I’ve had the good fortune to be enrolled in the Daughters of Osama bin Laden Mad-Rats-Asses School For Girls. Here we learn the real truth. How the Jews stole all the land from the Palestinians—how the Zionists took over the government of the United States—how FOX News deprived Sami al-Arian of life, liberty and the pursuit of Jihad —how Barbie dolls are corrupting our morals. Our money should be going to Hamas and Islamic Jihad—not to Coca Cola. America is robbing us of our innocence. Can there be a better reason to hate the dhimmis? They are stealing our culture. George W. Bush is a thousand times worse than Richard Lion-Heart—a thousand time worse than Ariel Sharon—a thousand times worse than…than…than…(Gasp! Gasp!) My hijab! It’s choking me! It’s choking me! It’s always choking me! Save me! Save me! Please, somebody—save me!”

Omar Bakri bin Bakri (Mad-Rats-Asses mullah): “You say we are preaching hatred; we say we are telling the truth. Franklin Graham says we are an evil religion. Would Franklin Graham fly a plane into a building to save Christianity? Would Franklin Graham blow himself up in a pizza parlor for Jesus? Would Franklin Graham cut off the hand of a thief for stealing what belongs to Allah? Would Franklin Graham drape Madonna and Britney Spears in burqas to save them from their natural depravity? No! Franklin Graham is a coward! I would fly a plane into that building, I would blow myself up in a pizza parlor, I would cut off the hand of that thief; I would clothe Madonna and little Britney in burqas to save them from woman’s natural depravity. I would do all that and more but my sacrifices for Islam are of such magnitude that I must delay my reward in Paradise in order to prepare others for Holy Jihad. You don’t know how I yearn for those 72 virgins. It’s a tough job but somebody has to do it. Maybe Allah, PBUH, will give me 73 virgins. You think so?”

( Mad-Rats-Asses schools operate openly in the United States)

ISLAM ISN’T EVERYTHING; IT’S THE ONLY THING

Vince Lombardi was one of the greatest football coaches of all time. They didn’t come any better. He was a legend long before he hung up his spikes. He played his college football at Fordham University. He was one of the immortal Seven Blocks of Granite—Fordham’s fabled offensive line that strung together 25 consecutive wins. After his college days he became an assistant football coach, first at Fordham, then at the United States Military Academy and then with the New York Giants of the National Football League (The NFL). In January 1959 he became head coach of the Green Bay Packers. In two years he took a team that had won only one game in twelve to the NFL’s championship game. He never had a losing season. He won three straight NFL championships (1965-67). That was as good as it got in the days before the Super Bowl. He won 105 games with the Packers and lost only 35. Rival NFL coach Norm Van Brocklin said, “ You have to hand it to Lombardi; he took those drunks off their bar stools and made world champions out of them.” Lombard had a simple philosophy. “Winning isn’t everything,” he said. “It’s the only thing.”

On November 1, 2006, Mohammed Riaz, sprayed gasoline throughout his home in Accrington, Blackburn, Lancashire, while his wife and four daughters slept. Riaz was from Pakistan. He had spent the first 22 years of his life in the notorious North West Frontier. Hell had only a half-acre in Wyoming and fewer devils per capita than Pakistan’s ‘Frontier’ province. There are more Tombstones and Dodge Cities in the land of the Pashtuns than Sonnybrook Farms. Rooster Cogburn would have needed a bodyguard and a head start to get from the Marshal’s office to the corral.

Mohammed married Caneze Khanan, an Anglo-Pakistani woman who had been sent to Pakistan by her father to find a husband. It wasn’t a shotgun wedding. No need for that. Point the Qur’an at the bride-to-be and the deed was done. And then it was off to England for the happily married couple. Years passed and problems developed. According to an acquaintance, Caneze “started to develop her own circle of friends and allowed the girls to express themselves in a more western way.” One of the girls wanted to be a fashion designer. Maybe that was the last straw. Mohammed set fire to the house. Caneze awoke but was overcome by smoke trying to protect her three-year-old daughter. The other three girls died elsewhere in the house.

Vince Lombardi said, “Winning isn’t everything; it’s the only thing.” For many Muslims, “Islam isn’t everything; it’s the only thing.” Lombardi had a life outside of football—a vigorous, robust life. Riaz had no life outside of Islam.

Samaira Nazir, 25, was a businesswoman. Friends described her as “strong-willed and well-educated.” She had studied tourism at Thames University. She was sent to Pakistan in 2004 for the usual reason—to ‘find a husband.’ She rejected her suitors, apparently wanting no part of an arranged marriage, and returned to England. Unbeknownst to her family, Samaira had fallen in love with a Mr. Mohammed, an Afghan asylum-seeker. They had kept their romance a secret for years. When Samaira told her family she wanted to marry Mr. Mohammed, they became upset—very upset.

At the police station, Samaira’s brother, Azhar Nazir, told the arresting officers that his sister “had to be stopped.” Samaira was summoned to the family home in Southall, Middlesex. Azhar, 30, and a 17-year-old cousin stabbed her repeatedly and then slit her throat. Nazir was found guilty of murder and is in Old Bailey. Samaira’s father fled to Pakistan to avoid prosecution. Police believe Azhar Nazir’s two daughters, aged two and four, were forced to watch the killing as a lesson.

“Winning isn’t everything,” said Lombardi, “it’s the only thing.” In Islam, “Religion isn’t everything; it’s the only thing.” Similar philosophies? Lombardi never shot a quarterback or set fire to the locker room. Maybe he prayed, maybe he prayed often. He was a Christian and the Good Book says you don’t shoot quarterbacks or burn your house down to rid yourself of an embarrassing spouse. Riaz and the Nazirs were reading from the wrong book.

Someone like Dennis Kucinich or Chris Matthews might say, surely, these things happen and they happen in all societies but they are isolated incidents. Have you anything more recent? Well—yes, in the past few days, three Palestinian women were murdered in the Gaza Strip. Each had been shot numerous times so it is not always by fire and sword. Officials have not ruled out ‘honor killings.’ How could they? In Islam every male is a Godfather with more power over family affairs than Mario Puzo ever dreamed of and woe to the wife, daughter or sister who should besmirch the family reputation with lewd or lascivious behavior, real or imagined.

The toll? An average of 25 women are murdered every year in ‘honor killings’ in the Gaza Strip, Samaria and Judah. “It isn’t everything; it’s the only thing.”

There’s more. In the village of Allah Bux Brohi, in Sindh Province on the Indo-Pakistani border, two young women, described as ‘girls’ by the press, were dragged into the street by their uncles and hacked to death in a killing that would have shocked Jack the Ripper. They surrendered to the police, said they did nothing wrong and felt no remorse. Lombardi would have been furious if one of his Packers had deliberately hurt a player on another team. Not only would it have been un-Christian, it would have provoked retaliation. Lombardi always played smart. Islam not only tolerates ‘honor killings,’ it uses them to keep women in line.

The ‘girls’ were buried without religious rites—which was best, perhaps, because it would have been an insult to end insults: Adolph Eichmann praying over the dead at Buchenwald—and the family refused to accept condolences.

Lombardi left his philosophy on the playing field with his game plan; he didn’t take it home with him. He was a great man—greater than Mohammed. If more Muslims left their religion in the mosque, maybe—just maybe—Caneza Riaz and her four daughters and Samaira Nazir and thousands and thousands of others would still be alive. But don’t count on it—according to the recent Gallup poll, 84 million Muslims believe 9/11 was justified and another 840 million would do nothing about it. “There is no God but Allah and Mohammed is His Prophet.” “Islam isn’t everything; it’s the only thing.”

There will be more ‘honor killings’ in the weeks and months and years to come. They will not stop until Islam stops. Few Muslims will mourn the victims—not Louis Farrakhan, not Keith Ellison, not Allah. It’s one hell of a way to start the 21^st Century.

Jimmy (Carter), Walter (Cronkite) and Charlize (Theron), unwitting Fifth Columnists

Jimmy Carter addressed a forum at Emory University in Atlanta. He took the opportunity to defend his latest book on the Middle East: Palestine: Peace not Apartheid. He said he believed a majority of Americans supported the book’s main proposals. It’s been 27 years since Jimmy was President. Most Americans under the age of 40 have only a dim recollection of Carter—if any. He was a President and not a very successful one. Aside from a small group of supporters few Americans are aware of his proposals.

Walter Cronkite was in San Jose with Barry Lynn, executive director of Americans United for Separation of Church and State. Walter is older than Jimmy. He was going into Normandy in 1944 while Jimmy was pretending to be a submarine commander. Walter was there to endorse the religious left’s new campaign to throw the Christians out of Washington. It’s called First Amendment First. That ought to catch on with the boys at Joe’s Bar and Grille and Gun Club. Walter said religion and politics were both important but “we ought to be able to concentrate on each of these without crossing the two of them.” Walter is even more irrelevant than Jimmy.

Charlize Theron was just back from Cuba. She had an Oscar but she didn’t have a Fidel. Now she has and Hollywood will have to take her seriously. Move over, Oliver Stone and Harry Bellefonte. When a CNN anchor asked her about the lack of freedom in Cuba, she snapped. “I would argue there is a lack of freedom in America. I seem to recall some time ago some reporters being fired from their jobs for speaking up on television about how they felt about the war.” There are only so many things one can say about empty-headed fools. Jimmy, Walter, Charlize—at least Jimmy and Walter can plead old age.

Eliza Manningham-Buller, director general of M15, the United Kingdom’s Security Service, recently warned her fellow Englishmen that there were 200 known terrorist networks aggregating 1,600 identified individuals involved in at least 30 terrorist plots. The conspirators—she didn’t say Jihadists—could number as high as 2,000. Jimmy and Walter and Charlize have no such fears. They have been immunized. It’s Israel and Jerry Falwell and George W. Bush that frightens them. It’s Zionism, Texas Gunslingers and Intelligent Design that threatens world peace.

With Jimmy and Walter and Charlize—unwitting Fifth Columnists—doing their part it should come as no surprise that anti-American feeling is soaring among Muslims. The latest Gallup poll conducted by the Centre for Muslim Studies in New York surveyed 10,000 Muslims in 2005 and 2006 in predominantly Muslim countries. The results should have been predictable. Hollywood, the religious left and Yasser’s best buddy have done their job well. Seventy-nine percent of the respondents in Saudi Barbaria had an unfavorable view of the United States. It was 65 percent in Jordan, 65 percent in Pakistan and on down the line.

How many Muslims have an unfavorable view of Jimmy Carter, Walter Cronkite and Charlize Theron? It’s a good question. One might expect that few Muslims have heard of Walter and Charlize, but Jimmy is more popular in Palestine than he is in the United States even amongst those who once voted for him. Jimmy’s religiosity excludes him from culpability in anything he might have done wrong. He made the following observation in his last book: “Having studied Bible lessons since early childhood and taught them for twenty years, I was infatuated with the Holy Land.” On a trip to Israel before he became President, he “took a dip in the Jordan River near where he thought Jesus had been baptized by John the Baptist.”

Whatever his intent, it didn’t work. Maybe the waters were too muddied by 1,400 years of Islamic heresies for the Holy Ghost to chance a descent, or perhaps Jimmy wasn’t ready. Back in the ‘20s and ‘30s when Jimmy was growing up in rural Georgia the Religious Right was noted for its anti-Semitism. Times have changed since then—maybe Jimmy hasn’t. Childhood fears and hatreds often resurface in later life. Young Muslims migrate to other countries, rediscover Islam and become terrorists.

Anti-Semitism has been shifting to the left since the 1950s. Israel has more to fear from the Democratic Party than from Republicans. The persistent persecution of Christians by Muslims in the Middle East (for over 1,400 years) has had its effect. Once the so-called religious right began visiting the Holy Land in considerable numbers after World War Two they soon came to the conclusion that their only friend in the Middle East was Israel.

This view no longer holds true on the religious left. The Interfaith Alliance and the National Council of Churches sees Israel as standing in the way of a rapprochement with Islam. If Israel would withdraw to its 1967 border and allow Palestinians the right to return there would be peace in the Middle East and Islam would be so thankful they would join with Christians and Jews in Robert Edgar’s Brave New Abrahamic Religion. Al-Qaeda and Hezbollah would beat their suicide belts into attaché cases, Christians and Jews would no longer be called apes and pigs—they would be upgraded to dogs and jackasses—and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad would travel to Tel Aviv and kiss Prime Minister Ehud Olmert on the cheek. And then pigs would fly and Jimmy Carter would say, “Ronnie Reagan wasn’t a bad man.”

The Rev. Welton Gaddy, director of The Interfaith Alliance, was at the San Jose rally with Walter and Barry Lynn. “That cherished freedom (the separation of church and state) is under severe attack,” he announced. Zionists and Texas Gunslingers worry the Rev. Gaddy. George W. Bush was putting pressure on Congress to pass his ‘Armies of Compassion Bill.’ “The faith-based initiative puts our civil and religious liberty at risk,” says Gaddy. This is dunderheadism of the first magnitude.

Embracing Islam as an equal partner in a new Abrahamic Faith would not only put civil and religious liberty at risk, it would put Rosie O’Donnell back in the kitchen—not an entirely bad idea—and most of womankind where Allah and the Prophet intended, waiting hand and foot on their masters between trips to the maternity ward. Sharia Law is not a passing fancy. It cannot be added to the US Constitution.

Charlize can be forgiven her ignorance—Dhimmy Carter and Walter Cronkite have no such excuse.